AdoptSpeak - The Social Network of the National Adoption Center


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Comment by Alex on May 20, 2014 at 9:38am



Thank you for taking time out of your busy schedule to consider this request. You are being invited to participate in a research study on the socialization processes of post-modern families. 


We are looking for lesbian and bisexual women who have either:  a) adopted a child (or children) of color or b) are currently in the process of adopting a child or (children of color) who is currently in their care as a foster child.  For the purposes of this study, a “child of color” is considered a person under the age of 18 years-old who is considered an ethnic and/or racial minority in the context of the United States.  Our goal is to gain a better understanding of the experiences of people who are helping to extend the depiction of what constitutes a “real family” beyond traditional assumptions of heterosexual parenting and shared physical characteristics.


If you will please grant us 15 – 20 minutes of your time to fill out an online questionnaire, we would greatly appreciate it! Below is the hyperlink to enter the study:


Thank you very much in advance for your time! 


Protocol ID: 14-244 

Kimberly J. Langrehr, Ph.D. 

Assistant Professor

Counseling and Educational Psychology

University of Missouri - Kansas City

215 Education Building

5100 Rockhill Road

Kansas City, MO 64110 - 2499

P (816) 235.2487 F (816) 235.6925

Comment by Alex on November 30, 2011 at 3:42pm

Happy holidays to you too!

Comment by Bill Freid on November 30, 2011 at 11:52am

Hi all my partner and I have been together 19 years and have 4 adopted kids and are now looking for our 5th .Like to wish you all happy holidays and god bless

Comment by Brent Eaches on September 20, 2011 at 1:12pm
We ran across this site in our adventure to check out adopting. My partner and myself have been together 10 years now. My partner has a 21 year old daughter which we have a grandbaby now to spoil. But we had always wanted to adopt and have spoken with my partners daughter and our family to make sure everyone would be on board for the adoption. Which I can honestly say we have a great support group. We live in the subs of Columbus Ohio and have started checking things out online to see what the process will be and where to even start. We are not looking to adopt a baby we are more leaning towards the age group of 3 up to age 6. But any help of where we should start would be greatly appreciated.
Comment by lashawndra howell on June 26, 2011 at 4:40pm

hey im very new to this,and im trying to start the process of adpoting a child. ive never done this so im alittle nervous. im 24 and im very mature and im at a point in my life where i have things together and stable so im just insearch of some guidance.

Comment by jeff harris on November 17, 2010 at 8:04pm
Well, the process keeps going on and on...... I am hoping to be closer after the firs of the year.....
Comment by Nicole Carlin on August 31, 2010 at 10:51pm
Hiiii there! (: My partner & I are slowly looking into the adoption process. We are both currently in the military & this is something that we REALLY want to do. We need help with our questions and are pretty unsure on where to start.. Any suggestions?! Please feel free to contact me. xo Nikki; <3
Comment by Patrick Woodward on June 29, 2010 at 10:22pm
Yes, as a matter of fact on the drive back home I told a friend about and told him it was worth it to see them. Love it is....

I like FB, but you're never on

Have my sights set on certification--HATE being at the mercy of something beyond my control.

A friend asked me if I had heard anything about the boys lately, and I replied that I hadn't since Friday. She asked me if I was ok with that. I told her I was b/c really they like it there for now; they are having fun; they are with kids their own ages; plus they have the structure and discipline they need. If you think about it, they are doing ME a favor by teaching them about rules and consequences--things they were never taught at home. By the time I get them, they will be house trained! lol Bless them!

Tomorrow is your big day! Please fill me in with all the details!
Comment by Tony HALE on June 29, 2010 at 3:41am
your ankle...ouch!!! but it was done outta love n play so mayb just oweeee lol.

cool we can talk more privately if we like on FB, just gotta leave a msg here n go there, which ever is better or we feel etc.

i know what'cha mean about where u live, i'm a big city boy n wouldn't know the first thing about down home living in a town (is that what they call u guys down there?). like u said, nice ta visit but i likes ma smog and traffic jams lol. i'd truly b lost in ur world and u in mine haaaa!!! i work from home mostly cause we own our own bizznesses which makes it easier when raisin kids.

ur class schedule is pretty much like ours was...offered every week on same day same time etc.

that certification i tell ya, makes a world of difference in who will give u the time of day. like i said, it really carries weight by letting them know u aren't all talk and really buckled down and learned some thing from the classes they offered and got cert.

if the mum and u have to come to terms in the beginning with her seeing the boys the court will order a supervise visit with a court ordered monitor. u most likely will not be allowed to be there as that would be the bio parent(s) hour or more of time. otherwise, a monitor wouldn't be necessary...get it? still by what u have told me, i don't think she has much of a chance when they give them to u. it just doesn't make sense to put them in safe care and still be torturing them with her visits etc? course i live here in lala land where all things r yummy so that one we'll pray on not to happen as it comes.

NO no no, no one will ever come to your home for a visit, its always in a neutral place that's suitable for all parties. They will not know where u live, against policy...u could sue if they gave out ur address to those weirdos!!!

we should have all parties on fone line wednesday for some q and a's as far as our two boys go. we'll talk about whether we two still want the boys (at that point they will still be sight unseen altho all SW say how yummy and cute they both r) and then i believe we go into full disclosure about them. from there they will send us their fotos. beyond that part, i don't have a clue other than knowing they r coming to live with us but what day n time is tbd (to b determined)? so its all about tomorrow since its already today and not yesterday anymore lol.

c ya!
Comment by Patrick Woodward on June 28, 2010 at 5:49pm
I will respond from the most recent down....I broke the distal fibula--way down there--of my ankle when I visited the boys the one time at the shelter. It was during our basketball play--perhaps I was a bit overzealous in my play, lol. These boys know how it's done. I stayed with them till my ankle went SNAP! lol

Thank you for the request. I was born in Jesup, but currently live in Kingsland, GA...about 20 minutes from the Florida line.

Having lived down here all my life, it's all I know. Do I have much in common with these southern people--not really. However, I have a good job that I love and a good relationship, and two/three boys who need me. I'm not much for the big city. It's good to visit, but I wouldn't want to live there.

@the classes--Also, I had much of what I've read from my education classes and workshops. As I thumbed through, there was some opportunity for role play--different scenarios to analyze, too. The classes here are usually offered on 3 consecutive Saturdays, which I prefer.

@suitable relatives--when I first spoke to CASA, she said she just didn't know who to recommend the boys stay with. From that I assumed if a suitable person were available, she would recommend him/her. I wasn't suitable b/c of my lack of Foster Care certification although I'd bet I was a better mom AND dad than most of this bunch is.

The CASA is only required to visit the boys 10 hr monthly. I'm not sure how she plans these hours. There might be some weeks she knows nothing new. I am going to let this week slide and try to make contact next week either with CASA or SW or both.

You wrote, "When u do get the boys (I really feel u have a strong chance of getting at least 2 of them) u may have to have visit from the mum that are supervised?" Who will do the supervising? Will it be in my home, or a neutral spot? To be honest, I'm a bit hesitant to let these people know where I live. However, they don't have a car and only dad has a license....Yes, I knew if I adopted the boys, any visits with the birth parasites would be my call. The only reason I think I would is that Elijah loves his "mom." If he asked to, I might arrange it after we're settled in. Otherwise, adios!!

Well, thank you for the praise. I've always been led by my heart and not my brain. Can the heart be wrong? I also have so many people at work and friends all over praying for this situation and on my side. Something good has already come from this--they are having the summer of their lives--swimming, games, 3 square meals, daily showers---I asked the shelter director twice if the boys needed any clothes. She told me Elijah came there with only the clothes on his back, and I bought him several outfits that fit. She was to find them at one of the foster mothers' houses. I doubt it was done. Everett had nice clothes b/c once he was removed and lived with his grandma and uncle, they bought him and Ethan new clothes. Poor Elijah only got what I bought him.....

I've only met the mom once in court. I'd heard horror stories before. They say she used to be beautiful, but time and drugs and low living dealt her a raw deal. Foul mouthed, unstable, a schizophrenic who wont take her meds (probably sells them like she did her food stamps). ZERO parenting skills...the dad just abides what she does and says and says nothing--a slug.

What have you learned about your two boys? I'm eager to hear what I have to look forward to.

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